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About a week ago, I said something that hurt my mother's feelings - and as punishment I had to go over to her house and build her a deck.

I'm exaggerating.  But only slightly. I did say something that hurt her feelings. And I did go over and help with the deck.

15 years ago, the three of us built the deck on the back of their house.  I learned yesterday that it's 1400 square feet of deck.  I don't think you really realize how freakin' big 1400 square feet is until you have to build it - or you move into your first apartment.  Because yesterday, while demoing our creation from 15 years ago it dawned on me just HOW LARGE their deck is...and how very small my first apartment was - comparatively speaking.

So, it's time for the old to come out and for the new to go in.  They got a quote for some new uber cool boards that they are going to use - and then the quote for just delivery of the boards and the quote if someone ELSE would build the deck for them.  Let's just say it was an easy choice to build it themselves.

There are muscles in my body right now that are screaming - and these are muscles that I didn't even know I had. My ass hurts. It hurts to sit down. It hurts to get back up. It hurts to bend over. I actually had to ask my daughter to get my shoes on for me this morning.  It's times like these where you realize you really need to get into the gym.

But given the way I feel I would rather blow up the nearest gym and then go for ice cream and watch it burn.

While sitting on the couch last night I asked my daughter to please not hurt herself in any way because I just didn't think I could muster the energy to save her life. Or even get up for a band-aid.  That's how awesome I am.

I could tell you how awesome my Mom and I are with power tools, or how every single time we accidentally killed an earth worm we would apologize - or how I wasn't allowed to kill any of the 5 million spiders that tried to eat me....But even the tips of my fingers hurt, so this is all you get.

Please send ice packs.


Big Kahuna said...

My last apartment was 840 sq ft ... I can dig it.

Sandy said...

My current abode is 767 sq ft. I also get it. Soaking baths followed by ice packs sound good. And lots of Aleve.

Mad Woman said...

Go soak in the tub...with bath salts. I sympathize. Or empathize. Or something. I get it!

just making my way said...

I need a fence put in - do you hire yourself out?

mumma boo said...

My house is 1400 square feet. That's a damn lot of deck. I hope she served beer! Feel better soon!

Carolyn...Online said...

Telling her not to get hurt because you can't rescue her is genius.

The Empress said...

I have the need for dbl shelves in my kids' closets in a bad way...I can offer a clean bed and a good breakfast??

Naked Girl in a Dress said...

I totally get this!! My mom invites me over with the kids for dinner and then I get handed a list of house projects to help her with before dinner is ready. I am not complaining though; I enjoy our time together and feel good helping her out.