The Mini Van Soap Box

I assumed because she was five that she was too young to care about 'all things cool'. So, at this young age she wouldn't care - or even know about - all those annoying things that kids get sucked into and obsess about. Like Hannah Montana or the Jonas Brothers or whatever else is/was hot. Apparently I was wrong.

She's been freaking out lately about High School Musical. Now, I realize that it's already done, out and old - but in this house - it never happened at all. I'm not sure if she got a whiff of it in school, or maybe on video day someone brought it in, but for whatever reason she's been chomping at the bit for me to get her this movie - and I was not about to go out and actually buy these movies (Did you know there are THREE OF THEM?) just to find out that she hated them.  So, I rented them on Netflix.  And then I made the mistake of watching them with her.

And now I have a bit of a crush on Zac Efron. Sigh.

So, I figured because I automatically just crapped on High School Musical when it first came out and never gave it fighting chance, I would give some other movies that I had crapped on a chance.

Like Twilight.

Seriously? Did you guys really like this movie? Did I miss something? Or was it one of those "You needed to read the books?" kind of things? Because I really don't see it! Like....At all! Maybe I'm old school Vampire, but I don't want mine sparkling in the sunlight like a cheap stain glass window. Also I didn't think he was cute. At all. Kind of creepy actually. And most of all - I don't get her. Go, find a nice boy that doesn't sparkle, who eats real food and settle down somewhere - where you don't have to worry about him eating your Poodle!


I have New Moon in my queue, and I'll watch it. Because I'm like that. But I'm sure I'll complain about that as well.

I've been battling this awesome head cold for about a week. The week before my husband had it - and I'm sure next week my daughter had it. It's the sheer joy of being a family. No germ can come home without it making it's way through everyone, and while although it sucks. - I appreciate at least this time it didn't hit my husband and I at the same time.  I could pick up the slack last week when he was being a loser - and he can pick up the slack this week when I was CURSING HIS NAME FOR GETTING ME SICK.

Seriously, there is nothing that I have not blamed him for in the last week.  Even the zit on my chin. Totally his fault. And you know what? I'm totally justified.  He was sick. He came home and, I don't know, breathed on me. He also used the same chap stick as me. So....I'm kind of putting my money on that one.

So, I'm on the upswing now - and while although not 100% better - I'm at least functioning and I got a little feisty tonight with my husband.

We are "keep a stick of butter out of the fridge" kind of people. There's always some butter that's available under cover for toast, or whatever you wish, when hard butter just won't do. Biggest issue is when you use the last of the soft butter and don't pull a new stick out. The next person has no soft butter. My husband CLAIMS he always does this. Tonight I proved he does not.  He found it very odd and quite humorous that I would keep track of the butter usage.

He compared this to my inability to turn a light off when I leave a room.

And while YES, I do have a problem with this. The difference is - I ADMIT I HAVE A PROBLEM.  I actually TRY to turn the lights off, but for some reason, I just can't do it. He actually believes he ALWAYS replaces the butter!

Do you see the difference?!?! Internet? Do you see?

Ever wanted a waffle but couldn't because all you had was cold hard butter that wouldn't melt on your processed frozen waffle product??

All I'm saying is that I admit my faults.

I can't believe I just wrote a whole post about butter.

I'm not sure when it happened, maybe six months to a year ago, but I know it wasn't my fault. I've depended on my iGoogle page for pretty much everything. It's the home page of every computer I look at during the course of the day. It has a box for my emails, my local weather, calendars, to do lists, reminders, and most importantly, my blog subscriptions.  So you can imagine how irritated I was when Google went and changed the layout. Again, I don't remember when this happened.

Everything was different. Nothing was where it was supposed to be. All of my emails were now partially open which annoyed me to no end.  If I'm not prepared to read an email - I don't want to just read the first sentence. So, I did some searching and apparently there were a group of people out there that were just like me and wanted the old way back. There was a fix. Just click on this and all of your iGoogle problems will go away.  So, I did. And it fixed it.

I didn't realize at the time that I was converting my iGoogle page to a base page in Canada. But at the time I didn't care.  My emails were where they were supposed to be - and my little boxes were all back in their rightful place.

It has, however, causeed some problems over the last year.  Being as my iGoogle page is now firmly planted in Canadian roots - every time I search for something in Google I only get Canadian results.You have any idea how long of a commute it is to get a Tree expert to come and give me an estimate on tree removal from Ontario. And I was equally frustrated to find that a website for a pediatrician that sounded great - was in Alberta.

Watching the Olympics was quite confusing...I didn't know who to root for! Who am I now? Why do I keep cheering for these people in red?!? Google is changing me from the inside out! Why do I care if they get another gold! Stop it Kerrie! Oooh! Look at the pretty red...Listen to your Google!

I tell you all of this because my Canadian iGoogle is broken. My blog subscription list hasn't "listed" anything for about 3 weeks now and I don't know what else to do - because I'm QUITE sure that y'all are still writing stuff.  So, I need someone American to fix me. Send me an American patch. I'm cutting my Canadian ties once and for all.

So, in conclusion, if I haven't posted on your blog in close to a month, it's because Canada made me do it.

So, my kid has a thing for vegetables. Yes, I know....Poor me.  I mean it's not like she WON'T eat a cookie...It's just that she would prefer a big bowl of cherry tomatoes or a green pepper with salt and pepper.  Yea, yea...I know....Poor me.

You have any idea how expensive green peppers are though - and how hard it is to find a GOOD pepper in the middle of winter in my area? This is a typical conversation before I run out of the house to pick up a few things at the store:

Me:  Honey, I'm running to the market - Do you need anything?
Him:  Oh, yea - I ran out of shaving cream. And could you pick up some coffee filters.
Me:  Sure.  Sweetie! Mommy is running to the store! Want anything special?
Her:  Yea! Green Peppers and a rutabaga! But only if the green peppers look good. No squishy peppers! If not green, then red. If not red - get yellow.

So, last summer my folks starting growing a garden in their backyard. It was great when we went over to hang out by the pool because anytime she wanted a snack we could essentially just POINT to the other end of the yard and she could yank a tomato off the vine and eat it, and then jump in the pool to wash off.  (just another reason why I hate winter and am counting the days to summer. I have to actually WASH my kid in the winter)

So, with all the picking and the eating and the washing, they were able to get her to try a few different things.  One of those things was a Jalapeno pepper.  Because that's fun y'all.  And honestly - if she's gonna get the shits - it's gonna happen at MY house...So, why not?!?

Well, she loved it.  So now every time I go to the store and have to take her with me, it's all, "Mama get me a HOLLOW PEEEENO. And I usually say no. Why? I have no idea. It just seems weird I guess.  Buying ONE jalapeno so she can have a zesty snack? Not to mention it's not going to fill her up, so 10 minutes later she's just going to ask for some bok choy anyway!

Well, this last weekend I gave in and got her one pepper. She was so excited to get home and eat it, I couldn't help but be excited as well.

We got home and I sliced it open and got the seeds out. I cut a little piece off for her to try - just to make sure it was what she remembered and not too hot.  She plopped it in her mouth like a champ and was all "Hell Yea!".  So, off she went with the rest of her jalapeno.  I threw the knife in sink walked away to the bathroom to blow my nose.

This is where it all went to shit.

About the time I finished blowing my nose - she came running back into the kitchen spitting and screaming "Wrong Pepper Mama! Wrong Pepper Mama!" and this is right about the time I started thinking what the shit is wrong with my nose-holy crap-is there actual FLAME coming out of my nose-i think i just set the bathroom on fire.

Three hours later we can only assume that the peppers at my local grocer were mislabeled and I did not buy a jalapeno, I bough a habanero and essentially tried to kill myself and my child.  We also figured out that I don't know JACK about hot peppers because I've been told BY MANY PEOPLE that it's pretty easy to tell the difference between the two.

My daughter isn't mad.  In fact, after the whole thing was over, she looked at me quite casually and said "So....we shouldn't buy peppers anymore. Just eat them at Grand mommy's."

Good idea Kid.  Let THEM burn your face off.


Update:  I'm not entirely convinced it was a habanero. I've looked at pictures on the internet and they don't look ANYTHING alike. I'm thinking it might have been a Thai Pepper.   It still makes me an idiot...but they look much more a like.