The other day we were all sitting on the couch and my daughter pulled out her little doctor set. She's going through this phase where everyone's foot is sick. And has to be cut off. Yea, she's darling. So, in the middle of amputating his foot she told him to say something very specifically. Apparently when getting your foot cut off there are EXACT words you would use. Well, he kept teasing her and wouldn't use the EXACT words, and she was getting extremely frustrated.

Which delights my husband to no end.

She started using this high pitch squeal that only dogs could hear - three states over - so when my ears started to bleed - I simply explained to my husband that if she starts to develop a habit of repeating the same word three or four times each time she's frustrated...It's proof that it's HIM that makes us the way we are.

You see, much to his delight, I have this bizarre habit of repeating a word three or four times when he's being a horses ass.

"Why, Why, Why, Why would you do that"
Even after all these years it STILL makes him laugh hysterically. Which, of course, ONLY PISSES ME OFF MORE, which makes me repeat more words. It's a vicious cycle that he has created for his own amusement.

My daughter and I are currently planning ways to glue his butt checks together. We were thinking that we would saran wrap the toilet...but I would just get stuck cleaning it up.

In somewhat related news.

I was discussing with the man that I'm married to all these freakin' neck problems I'm having and that we've pretty much established that if I could just quit my job and not sit in front of a computer all day - I would be cured.

"You should get a better chair at work."
"No, my boss already got me one of those really expensive ergonomic chairs. Doesn't help. I think I'm going to take my home office crappy chair to work and switch them out."
"Wait. You're going to take the shitty chair from down the hall to work and bring the good chair home...To the office you never use."
"Yea, I'm thinking maybe I'm backwards. And that good chairs don't work on me. Only crappy ones."

After a long pause I said...

"These are the reasons you love me, right?"
"No dear - I love you despite these reasons"


Badass Geek said...

When I played doctor as a kid, the solution to the problem was amputation, too. Kids logic, right?

just making my way said...

When my kids play doctor there are always lots of shots involved. Thankfully, no amputation...yet.

These are the reasons WE love you anyway!

mumma boo said...

Hmmm...I think I'll be happy that to Cenzo, playing doctor means sticking a flashlight up the patient's nose and yelling "Anything up dere? Nope!" over and over again. Maybe amputation only comes into play when they hit kindergarten. ;)

Big Kahuna said...

Excellent ...

But when I played doctor it involved removing clothing.

Brandy Rose said...

I got me one of those expensive ergonomic chairs once, it lasted maybe a week and is now set aside for company on gamers night.