I'm sure we aren't the only parents to question ourselves everyday about something we're doing to her - or something we're doing for her. Every other day or so, usually during her bath time, we'll discuss if we are making the right decision about keeping her in her current pre-school. We realize that we are never going to have a perfect situation, and there are always going to be things that we don't care for - regardless of where she is. No situation is perfect, as much as we wish it was.
However, we got to the point last week of "the final straw", and within two days I had found her a new school and yanked her from the old.
While I won't blabber on about how great her new school seems to be, or how clean and pretty it is, or all the great programs they offer for her - I will say that it seems to be a great school and I feel that we made the right decision.
I was faced once again this morning though with the one thing that is the hardest for me to do. As much as I know how important it is to let them make their own choices and to let them 'go', the desire for me to do everything for her and 'fix' everything is very strong.
She's starting a new school not knowing her new teachers or having any friends at all. I won't lie - A big part of me wanted to stay at that school this morning and introduce her to everyone and scream "EVERYONE MUST LOVE MY CHILD".
But I didn't. I walked her in and allowed another women to get her settled. She looked a little shell shocked & a bit confused about her new surroundings - and made a small step towards me. I smiled my big "everything is so great here" smile, told her I loved her, and left.
I have no doubt that she's having a great time and making new friends, but that doesn't mean that I'm not eyeballing the clock every ten minutes, waiting for the end of the day.
It struck me as I was driving to work....If starting her in a new pre-school gives me ulcers....I'm going to be dead by the time she's 18.
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3 comments:
Ugh - that's the toughest thing, isn't it? I remember doing that with Cheeks on her first day of pre-school. If my husband hadn't *lovingly* whispered, "We're already late - c'mon already!", I probably would have been tucking her in at rest time. Kudos to you for letting go and trusting that she'd be ok. Bet you gave her huge hugs when you picked her up, though! :)
Lil Joe's preschool year just ended, and I am still carrying the guilt of not being able to drop him off for his first day last August. Parts of it become easier (as Princess steps into 5th grade this fall, I'm sure she wants me far, far away) but part of it never goes away.
Aww. I'm sure she had a great time, but I can understand how scary that must feel!
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