If you've been following along, and seriously what else could you possibly be doing with your time, you know that I had pulled my daughter out of school - and put her in a private preschool.

All in all it's been fantastic!

Yesterday was her first 'field trip'. Big plans to go to the local petting zoo, ride the hay ride, see a really big ass turtle and possibly contract E Coli. Big Day - Big Day!

Now, me being a rookie 'field trip' Mom, I followed all the rules, checked and re-checked my 'to-do' list and went to sleep knowing that my daughter would embark on an adventure of a life time - simply because I'm a Rock Star Mom who allows her daughter to ride a bus and play with goat poop.

At about 10:00 the next morning I was informed that the field trip had been postponed until the following day because of rain AND that my daughter was not allowed to have her packed lunch.

Again, me being the rookie Mom.....it didn't even dawn on me that I can't send my kid to school with a peanut butter sandwich.

To make matters worse - I had even put little peanut butter cookies in her lunch box as well.

I might as well have lathered her hair in peanut oil and instructed her to lick everyone.

The staff was very understanding and sweet about my slight oversight (or my attempt to kill off half of the children at the school) and gave me an extra copy of the "School Guidelines" pamphlet.

I think I'll send her to school next week with a 12 pack of Miller Lite and some Lucky Strikes.


Ms Picket To You said...

Listen I have this very cute 12 pack cooler I picked up at Target. I'll send it on over. It has nice little pocket in the front too for smokes or porn or what have you.

-k said...

Oooh! Porn! Great Idea! They can watch it on Video Tuesdays!

Christine Bilek said...

That's hilarious. You could always send her in with jello shooters...you can't be allergic to jello, can you?

MadWoman said...

I have a couple of ceremonial daggers that you could send in for Show & Tell. I'm sure they would have a great time teaching other the best places to stab someone.